You all know how much I love a good “drunken mess” story. Namely because I have been there, but this one is about Hayden Panty-Tiara or whatever the Devil her name is and I love her like a cold sore. This one comes from the print edition of National Enquirer so lets all put on our imagination caps.Via Celebitchy:“Hayden Panettiere suffered a meltdown at a recent bash, drunkenly climbing on top of a pool table and breaking down in tears, according to eyewitnesses. The 20-year-old “Heroes ” star “turned into an out-of-control party animal” at the home of Dole Food Company heir Justin Murdock, a fellow partygoer told the Enquirer.“Hayden was the party guest from hell!” added the source. “She was a complete drunken mess!”Ah, yes. Usually I climb on top the pool table and sing my rendition of “Push It” (by the lovely Salt-N-Pepa), but this mess started crying. (For the record I have only gotten drunk and cried one time and in my defense that was because I got hit in the head with an empty keg. True, but long story.) Then she made the ultimate mistake of letting her boobs take over the show.“Hayden was sobbing uncontrollably on her hands and knees on top of the pool table with her boobs hanging out of her dress,” said the eyewitness. “Her girlfriends tried to help her down and pull up her top, but she kept pushing them away. Everyone was shocked at how drunk Hayden got.”Panettiere was also rumored to have gotten a boob job.